The Bangles - Walk Like An Egyptian

The Bangles have the moves. Walk Like An Egyptian is a basic guide in how to make a fool of yourself on the dancefloor. If you can frug to this and not do at least one stupid Egyptian hand move then you are better than me.

Five hairbrushes of five.

Michael Sembello - Maniac

Famously featured in the film Flashdance, Maniac is a song that never needed to exist. It's the kind of record produced by someone who thought more is more, and that lyrics never need to make sense. In fairness chaps will appreciate the bottom shots in this. Otherwise this tribute to the bunny boiling metal workers of the dancefloor doesn't bear repeated listening.

Unless you enjoy dancing in the "danger zone", of course. Three hairbrushes out of five.