Michael Jackson - Off the Wall

Jesus juice, crotchless bunny suits and duck butter to be forgotten. This is a great track.



It's worth noting that a lot of Michael Jackson classics were written by Rod Temperton. Including Thriller. Rod Temperton is from Cleethorpes. Yes, when you've been hitting that dancefloor, you're being made to shift your feet by a chap from Cleethorpes.

What killed Michael Jackson?

Was it:

a) sunshine
b) moonlight
c) good times
d) boogie?

Alan Parsons Project - I Wouldn't Want To Be Like You

Another crusty 1970s number from the Alan Parsons Project. The video was shot around the Royal Festival Hall on London's South Bank, with its confusing alienating "robot". In the olden days, brutualist architecture was enough to make you rip up flowerbeds and jump and up down staircases at random. We've all seen A Clockwork Orange.

If the track reminds you a little of Pink Floyd, that would likely be because Alan Parsons engineered Dark Side of the Moon for the band.

Dee Irwin - I Only Get This Feeling

My heart beats a little bit stronger... if you need it, here's a two minute cure for angina pectoris.

Other versions exist of this Northern Soul ballad recorded in 1968, but this remains the best, if not simply for the Spector/Turner style mid section.

Keith Prowse - Light and Tuneful

Ah, Wimbledon. Home of the strawberry, sweatband, and sunburn. This year I shall be donning my boater in the centre court and making light clapping noises as Roger Federer's bottom goes past.

The only downside to actually being at Wimbledon and not watching it on the BBC is the lack of the super theme tune of Keith Prowse. So here it is:

Peaches and Herb - We Got Love

Another disco classic, and isn't Peaches gorgeous?

The best thing is that they look like are having a ball singing it. And when was the last time you saw a male singer just sweetly hold the hand of the girl he's duetting with?

Aquarian Dream - Phoenix

A boy in pants on flaming dove.

Even the background snare and hi hat sounds like the truffling snuffling of London toilets. Ceefax music to take bolivian marching powder to, but there's nice groove to this. Very moreish.

The Who - Pinball Wizard

Elton John once stayed in a Park Lane hotel, and irritably rang recption to ask them if "they could do something about the rain". We forgive him because once upon he did this track with the Who, and was great. Nobody plays pinball anymore, but Pinball Wizard remains piano at its cockiest and rockiest.

Eurovision Special

Okay, it's a month late, but things move slow in the world of the Pink Half. Eurovision is a silly nationalistic contest, which like as official top pop nation in the world, Britain likes to win. No one is to pretend we don't want to win. We want to colonise it. We've currently got a new Cold War against the ex communist bloc because they are all voting for each other. At least they're voting, eh?

Here's Lulu with the enigmatic "Boom Bang-A-Bang". If you listen closely you can hear Sid James tickling Barbara Windsor in the orchestra pit.

Brothers Johnson - Strawberry Letter 23

Another lush one, oh well. I promise something edgy soon. But my excuse is that this is just as lovely as rainbow kittens.

Grupo Santa Esmeralda - Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood

Outstanding. Makes you glad that Quentin Tarantino is such a music geek.

Motown Music Machine - Bach To Bach

You know everytime I hear this I wonder what the seventies were like. What kind of bad king arse nightclub could play this record? I just want to see the dancing. You'd have to be good to dance to this properly, I think, and not look like some air punching twit.

Simultaneously brilliant and also very silly, Motown Music Machine is what would be playing in your dentist were he the Devil.

Judy Cheeks - Mellow Lovin'

So irritating that I cannot find this brilliant track anywhere on the internet. Not even on CD. It therefore goes on the list.

It's black soul Abba. Oh goody!